Child Trickery.

Stella has been really funny lately. I mean, she's always funny, but saying funny things and asking "Big Girl" questions. A few weeks ago, while driving home from a day spent at Grandma & Grandpa's, we were talking about the baby. Out of the clear blue, Stella asked us "how did that baby get in momma's belly?" We both looked at eachother, chuckled for a moment nervously and I turned to her and said, "can I get back to you on that?" She said, "ok!" I've yet to decide to tell her anything and she hasn't brought it up again since. It seems like she's too young to be asking a question like that, but I guess it just comes with the territory now.

On the way to grandma's this morning for her usual day at grandma's while I work, we were talking about the possibility of her attending preschool. You see, we applied to get into a free program at the school up the street from our house, that also happens to be the school that my mother is a teacher at. The normal preschool program there runs $100/month, but this program is free and depends on various factors such as income, housing situation and the like. We knew that when we applied, it would be REALLY iffy if we'd even get in, but we thought what the hell, with Matt being in the auto industry, our income varies from month to month and now, with all that we've found out about our mortgage, preschool of $100 or more a month is simply not in the cards, it would literally break the bank. So, I had completely lost all hope of preschool for Stella. Then a couple weeks ago I got a call from the school asking if we were still interested in having Stella attend and I excitedly replied, most definitely. My hope was renewed and I called my mom to see what she thought our chances were and she agreed, if they were calling, then we were probably pretty much in. However, the other day, she went to the school to see what the situation was and was told that there were less spots available than who applied, so she told me not to count on it, but that we still had a shot because she filled the teacher in on our current monetary situation. I don't really want to get in because my mom helped us, but I REALLY don't want Stella to have to miss out on preschool, I know she's ready, she NEEDS this! So, we will find out for sure on September 2nd, keep your fingers crossed. But, getting back to the car ride. So, in all that talking about school, I think she was starting to feel like a big girl and she proceeds to tell me that big girls don't have their grandma's watch them. I laughed and said, are you sad that you're going to grandma's, she promptly said NO, but I thought it was a very funny thing for her to say. The girl who sometimes cries on the weekends when she forgets that she isn't going to grandma's for 2 whole days.

Then, tonight I decided to make eggplant parmesan for dinner. I didn't want to tell Stella exactly what we were having, so I lied and told her it was chicken with cheese and sauce. She ate nearly every bite, but asked me why I made "tires" for dinner? Matt and I both thought it was pretty inventive of her to see eggplants as tires, but not once did she say "this isn't chicken!" When she was done, we told her what it really was and at first she was shocked and sort of disgusted, but then realized that it tasted pretty darn good anyway.

A Positivity Theme.

A very, very kind neighbor has loaned to me the book "The Secret." Cheesey to some yes, but right now, it's exactly what I need. My normal outlook on a daily basis for the last couple years is downright negative and look where it has gotten me. Now, I am taking the blame for past injustices and forging forward in a new spirit of positivity. My new mantra: "Good thoughts are strong, negative thoughts are weak. I'm only going to think good thoughts!" Yes, this is a new thing for me, and in doing so, I have already remembered one good thing today, that will help lessen the pressure we are under when our mortgage readjusts in November, taking $34 worth of pressure each month off of a $130/month stress. Not too shabby!

Been Trying To Keep Busy.

Well, since dealing with the reality of a potential foreclosure, I've been trying to do as much as I can to keep my mind off of it. So far, it's not easy, but yesterday somehow ended up being a good day. I paid for half of my space at the Craftique mall, $20 and brought together 8 projects so far, and I'm going to try to paint something today as well. It was a nice release, and kept me distracted. Here are the pics of my projects currently for sale. They probably won't sell, it's my luck, but my fingers are crossed.

Problem With A Bedroom Routine.

So, we have a problem. Every single night when we put Stella to bed we try to get all the requests out of the way before she can even ask for them. You know, the I need a glass of water, I need to go potty, yada yada yada. We get her ready for bed, brush her teeth, read her stories and then gives kisses and hugs and all the other junk and tuck her in with a goodnight. Every single night I hope that this means sleepy time is not far off. However, then the annoyance ensues, the 4-10 times she gets up for the same things we've already given her again and again and quite often one begets another, such as too much water equals the need to go potty. Now, I know this is absolutely normal, but my question is this: "How do I stop getting so frustrated and annoyed with her?" And, is she just not tired enough to go to bed and should we move up her bed time? She never used to be this difficult and I get so angry with her and then I feel so bad for getting mad at her. It's a vicious cycle in our house right now.

She is having a really hard time with authority lately and as with all kids, listening. The other night she was playing at the neighbors house but kept coming back home to tattle on the other girl. I was like, tell HER mom, she's right there, don't tell me. Then when it was time for dinner, she ran away from me and made me chase her. Finally, I had Matt go get her. We ate dinner and she proceeded to sneak out the back door, forcing Matt to literally chase after her with her kicking and screaming in the wake of it all. Please tell me it is just a phase or the full moon and that it's not simply that I'm a bad parent, but that it's her immature brain trying to hardwire itself during her development!!!!!!! All I have to say is, I'm looking forward to Thursday when my mom picks her up in the morning to spend the night and all day Thursday and Friday with Grammie and Papa. I love her, but she's working my last pregnant nerves lately.

Is this the acting out because of the baby already???

Boys Will Be Boys.

That's what I hope anyway. Yes, it's a BOY!! We are very excited and blessed to be able to have one of each now. Everything looked good on the ultrasound and he was moving like crazy all over the place. Stella got very excited while watching her new baby brother on the monitor. Now, we just need to agree on the name, Matt is coming around to my choice, so once he decides if he likes it, I'll reveal "our" name for the baby to be. So, I've made my first boy item of clothing purchase. Aren't those jammies cute? I just love Target and getting a bargain. It was from a set of 2 that apparently got separated and so the cost for the pj's was only $1.71. Can't beat that. I'm hoping to stock an entire dresser drawer for about $100. Maybe that's a dream and (no, I'm not that cheap) I'm just sort of setting up a challenge for myself, besides, I have a VERY small dresser. I'll post pics of the dresser once I do my magic on it. I don't have an exact plan for it yet, but something will come to me, it always does.

The other day my mother and Stella and I went to Ikea in search of various goodies, one of which was curtains. The ones I thought I wanted to buy were not what I expected and looked really cheap, so I was sort of bummed. But then my mom saw these bins with packages of material and they were quite big piece of material for $3.99, so I picked up 3 packages and lastnight started to fashion some simple curtains. Well, curtain, as I was only able to complete one window curtain. We've had the same curtains on the window since before we moved in and I've always seen them as temporary and have always hated them, but until you have to buy curtains, you don't realize just how expensive they are, sometimes you just make do with what you can afford. I'm an extremely simple sewer and have never had any formal training on a sewing machine, my mom showed me how to thread the machine and that was about it, so I'm quite remedial, but that's enough to sew a hem in my book and I've made skirts and purses and now CURTAINS and oh yeah even some mini books that I've sewn in. So, here are the start of my new curtains, what do you think? It felt really good to take time out of my day to do something for myself. It has been a long time since I've said, "screw it, I'll make up the hours another day, now I'm doing something for me." Also, I'm going to have a booth at my local "Craftique" store and once I get some things finished up, I'll post pics of them too. It's going to be so fun to just do more creatively.

Something Close To My Heart.

I just got info about this in my email and it's really inspiring to me as a graphic designer and someone who likes to have a creative outlet outside of my "work life." It's for a documentary on underground poster designers called Died Young Stayed Pretty and it's all about the urban poster movement for artists just trying to make a living a get word out about something, it looks really cool and you should check it out, I know I will.

Starting Over Is Never Easy.

Sadly, In so many words, I screwed up my blog and because I'm not technically minded, I DON'T know how to fix it. You know how in the movie Zoolander Ben Stiller and Owen Wilson get into disguises to get files out of a computer, but all they end up doing is beating on the computer because they think the files are located literally "inside" the computer. Matt laughs at me all the time about that because he says that when I have a problem with my computer, that's how I act. Nice. So, here's to another, better blog. Really, I think it suits me more, it was hard not to complain, even just a little bit sometimes. But, in this one, I'm going to put my best foot forward and try to showcase some of my own creativity, not always just somebody elses. I will however, showcase things of others that TRULY inspire me every day. So, here's to no more dumb ass maneuvers on my part with this blog and here's to a new life on the internet.